Doesn’t need glasses!


Keeper of the Truth
As the Kardashians celebrate their 20th and final season, I would LOVE to congratulate myself for never watching a single episode.

My grandfather is 90 and he still doesn't need glasses.
He just drinks straight from the bottle.

I wonder how many, who were never told the story about the boy who cried Wolf, are now wishing they could have their tits or penises back?

Me: "Will I be okay Doc?"
Doctor: "I doubt it. Mercury is in Uranus right now."
Me: "I don't believe in any of that Astrology bullshit!"
Doctor: "Me neither. My thermometer just broke!"

Ironically, white people actually have the lightest fingers.