When niggers call in "sick"

[NintWahdYT]

A few years ago I heard one of the funniest excuses ever to not come to work.
I'm a cook by trade, and one of our buck "stewards" (dishwasher) called the chef and said, "Chef, I cain't find mu pants. Cood I jes wear mu shorts tud-day?"
Chef's reply, of course was "No."
"Well, guess I won' be cummina work then."
"I guess you don't have a job, then." Click.:nigban

Another time, an older nig buck was in for an interview and said "Chef, I's could start today, but I doesn't got my incidentials.":lmao

Anyone else got a good one? I'm sure there's plenty!
:fullof

[ThinWhiteLine]

That is a new one. Nigger called in naked. "I'd come to work but I aint beez wearin no clothes"

[Oppressor]

That is a new one. Nigger called in naked. "I'd come to work but I aint beez wearin no clothes"

Be glad he didn't just show up naked and say "Where duh White wimminz at?" Tom Shelly probably wouldn't mind if he was out with his wife.

[subhumanscum]

At least he called in sick.

A place I worked at for four years had one particular nigger.

Every friday afternoon or night shift he was absent. They had that much grief off him playing da raycis card they just left him to it. For 4 years 2 days off every 3 weeks sick and nobody did Jack!
In four years I was ill once. Was ill over the weekend but still too ill on monday. On tuesday I woke up felt better not 100% but better so went in I hate being off ill. I lasted about 3 hours most of that on the toilet so went home.

They counted that as 2 absenses and gave me a warning!!!!!

all the niggers turned up when they wanted they called it caribean time and chimped out if they got docked. most of the time they didnt because HR coundnt be arsed with the agro any more. They won again, chimping out works in the UK.

it was comon for them to book 1 weeks holiday and have a month off. when confronted a chimp out would follow they didnt see anything wrong in taking a month off and expected to get paid the same.

[skillet]

of course you got a warning. You're not a nigger; aside from murder, and possibly theft, the nigger has a blank check and get out of jail free card. In fact, "nigger productivity" is the ultimate oxymoron.

That no pants excuse is a classic one, though

[CoonTownYT]

As some of you may already know I was a team leader at my last job, although my duties were supervisory in nature due to there not being a supervisor or manager on that shift. That was okay with me, supervisors were salary and I was hourly, keekekeekee.

Anyway, when I first started there as an operator I was told that I could only miss one day within the first 90 days and then it had to be excused from a doctor. That rule was quickly thrown out the window when they found out they were hiring mostly niggers. Niggers don't have to abide by rules, you know.

When I moved to team leader after a while, shit got really disgusting. Our attendance was based on a point system, 8 points and you were out. Showing up late was a 1/2 point. One point for missing a day, and automatic termination for no call/no show. I quickly learned that these rules do not apply to niggers, of course not!

I had one nigger, an older nigger, that showed up on time for work everyday. Other than that, on any given day I was lucky to have 75% of the "workers" there. Most of the time they wouldn't call and I'd fire them promptly, and after getting rid of so many Human Resources "Manager" (a sheboon) GOT ON ME about firing so many people. Of course she did not give me a reason why I shouldn't have fired them, they were just niggers and apparently you aren't supposed to fire niggers. Fuck her, I continued.

The excuses were unbelievable. When I say that, I don't just mean you wouldn't believe them, but it was the sheer crass of them that pissed me off. I once had a sheboon call in because it was "too drunk" or "too high". I also had to let go many of the niggers for coming into work drunk, and guess who got in trouble for that? One of my most memorable was a sheboon that called in because last night on the way home, it ALMOST hit a deer. She said it was "traumatic" and that she wasn't coming in.

There was one nigger that I knew was a huge cokehead and stank worse than any nigger I've ever smelled in my life. This nigger was always borrowing money from other niggers and never paying them back, and needless to say he was not well-liked. He got his ass whipped by two niggers one night behind the back door, I let them do it. Anyway, for whatever reason I could not get this nigger fired for the longest. It got to the point where it was missing EVERY SINGLE MONDAY AND/OR FRIDAY. But it wouldn't call in, it'd text message the older nigger that was giving it a ride and then the older nigger would tell me. Despite me constantly harassing him and threatening him he continued to do this. It did call in a few times, and the excuses were pathetic. Once he told me that his daughter was in a 4-wheeler accident (they don't own one), and that she was in the hospital in a nearby county (that county does not have a hospital). Once he called in and said that he got his income taxes back and he was taking the day off, then he came in the next day and asked if I knew anything about filing income taxes and if I'd do them for him if he paid me. This nigger would constantly lie about it's niglets and family to get out of work, once he said his daughter died. I asked the older nigger that gave him a ride to work if that was true, and he told me that no, that daughter was outside playing in the yard when he went to pick him up.

This nigger then went to jail for child support for two weeks. I thought to myself, "Finally, that stinking motherfucking cokehead is gone". After two weeks, this nigger TROTS BACK IN. Sheboon Resources tells me to let him back. It was summertime, and his stench was too much to bear. OTHER NIGGERS were complaining about how bad he stank, how bad is that?! Finally I had enough, and I called DHEC and told them he was a health/hygiene hazard. They fired him shortly thereafter after orders from DHEC because apparently this nigger refused to wash. Of course the sheboon HR gave me shit for that, too. Me and that nigger bitch got into it more times than I can count, threatened to fire me several times and I told her that if she did I have every bit of documentation to back up my actions and that she has none. Turned out I ended up getting HER worthless ass fired later on.

I had two white operators, both girls. One was a coalburner that flirted with me incessantly and I hated her fucking guts. She was one of my best workers though so I let her stay, and threatened harassment charges if she continued to flirt with me :lol Decent looking girl, unfortunately. One day all of a sudden I'm informed that these girls were fired for "missing too many days". One had missed two days, the other had missed one. They were both excused. Yet nothing was ever done about the niggers that missed every Friday or every Monday because they were too drunk and jenkumed.

OK Sorry this post was alot longer than I originally intended, and went off topic quite a bit.